Three SOLDIERS and a Lady: 004

004. First

"What is human life? The first third, a good time; the rest, remembering it."

Angeal knew for a fact that, with adoption, there would be many things he would have missed.

He would never witness his little girl's first steps; he'd imagine himself holding her tiny hands while she clumsily put one foot in front of the other in a facsimile of walking. Angeal would keep hold of her until she was sure of herself, then let go to watch her toddle across the room.

He would never know what her first word was, whether it was 'dada' or 'daddy', 'mama' or 'mommy' or even something as random as 'spoon'. Her voice would have been so small, yet delighted as she giggled at the pleased look her father would have on his face as he held her close.

But her first smile would also never be his and neither would her very first laugh; they would forever be the possessions of another man.

And he would never know the feel of her being cradled in his arms as she would take her first breaths in a strange new world; it was only a far off dream.

Angeal knew that he had miss out on all of the formative (and most important) years of his child's life and there wasn't enough Time Materia on the Planet that would allow him to turn back the clock. However, for all those moments lost, he would find a million new ones waiting for him with each morning.

There was a bright future for Angeal and Persephone, filled with lots of firsts and new beginnings just for them. Angeal was looking forward to the girl's first day at school; the day she would make her first friend in class; when she would take her first chocobo ride near Kalm with him and Genesis; her first attempt at making a cake, because she wanted to make something for hos birthday; to their first celebrated holiday and to her first birthday with him and whatever else a young girl could get up to. Yes, the future seemed wonderful and he was going to face it head-on and enjoy each and every moment, although he did worry a bit.

Like the first time Persephone would be hurt; that was something he did not wait for with bated breath. As any father would, he vowed that he would never allow any child of his to come to any harm, if he had any say in the matter. While a SOLDIER First Class with great tactical know-how and physical strength, he did have his limitations, but Angeal would turn a blind eye to them—his daughter would become his everything, his driving force in each battle!

It was nice to know he had someone to come home to now, instead of just an apartment filled only with plants (which he had been close to naming and giving personalities to).

The man was already dreading the day when she would be taken from him. Who knew when that first love would strike? Who knew when love would firecely take hold of his daughter's heart? Who knew when a simple boyfriend would transform into a fiancé? Who knew how long before he would have to give away a young, smiling bride?

How long before Angeal would be allowed to see his first granchild?

Of course, this was still very far off from becoming Angeal's reality. A very long ways away before any of that could possibly happen, because, right now, his daughter was only six years old and was still coping with the loss of her birth parents and such trauma would never just go away. All Angeal could do right now was to be there for her and care for her to the best of his ability. There was no use in wishing for what couldn't be and for what had yet to happen. His role as of now was that of a doting father and he would play that role, because...

Knock-knock.

Angeal blinked up at the ceiling of his bedroom, being pulled out of his musings. The door slowly creaked open and a small, dark head peered inside at him. Here was the girl who occupied his thoughts, the only woman in his life other than his mother. She shrunk a little when he turned his gaze onto her, probably still a little scared by how his eyes glowed in the dark, due to his mako injections. Timidly, the girl entered the room, moving to his bedside as he rolled over to properly face her.

"Papa Angeal?" she whispered very quietly. She chewed her lip, a nervous habit she had whenever he felt nervous. Sighing softly, Angeal reached out and stroked her head, running his fingers through her short dark hair.

"Yes, Persephone?" the man inquired gently. He wasn't very tired and had been thinking all night about the future and if that sad look on her face was because she was sorry for waking him, then he would erase expression. "What is it?"

The girl was tugging at the hem of the overly large shirt he had given her to use as a sort of night dress (he really was going to have to get some pyjamas or a night gown for the girl); it was quite big and slipped off of her shoulders, despite it being a shirt from his younger years in SOLDIER, but the girl look positively adorable in it and wouldn't wear anything else to bed. The child's knees were showing, since she lifted the shirt up by the hem and was fidgetting with it. She was very anxious about what she was about to say and he knew she wanted to tell him something at...

He checked the wall clock.

...Two in the morning.

It was way past her bed time.

"May I sleep with you tonight?" she pleaded. "I had a bad dream."

Angeal's expression soften sympathetically, knowing about the nightmares the girl regularly had since that one day in Wutai. From the few times she had told him about the contents of those dreams, he knew they were about the deaths of her parents and the violent war going on in her mother's homeland. During those times, he had allowed his daughter to sleep with him.

"Sure. Hop in." Angeal pulled the covers aside and Persephone gladly crawled into bed with him, wasting absolutely no time in snuggling into his side. He smiled faintly as he wrapped an arm around her tiny frame, listening to her sigh in content. He rubbed her back, doing his best to lull her into slumber this way, because he was a doting father and that was his role and he would enjoy every single little moment like this, because there was so much they had to do. Just like this, Angeal would be by Persephone's side as she grew up, guiding her through the rough patches in life.

And he would love her so very much, as if she were his very own flesh and blood. And it would surprise him just how much he'd love her, to the point of never wanting to let her go.

But she was still young and sweet and he...well, he was already a little old, but the SOLDIER found that he could be content with just that, as long as he could watch his little Persephone grow up into a wonderful young lady.

But, first things first, before that would come to be, all little girls need their rest.

"Go to sleep, Seffie," he murmured softly, using her nickname, "I'll keep the bad dreams away."

The girl shifted a bit. "Promise?" the girl asked.

He tucked a lock of her dark hair behind her ear as the answer came so very easily, "Always."

There was a pregnant pause where the silence reigned so long that Angeal though that, perhaps, the girl had finally fallen asleep already, but then he surprised him by moving. She wiggled her way upwards and placed the sofest kiss he had ever been given—as light and deliate as a butterfly's wing—right on his slightly rough cheek. She giggled at the stubble that rubbed against her skin.

"Thank you, papa. Sweet dreams," she whispered to him, before lying down beside him.

Smiling, Angeal took a chance and returned her kiss-on-the-cheek with an affectionate peck on her forehead.

"Sweet dreams, Seffie," he replied. Closing his eyes, he tried going to sleep, the soft breaths of his sleeping daughter being his own lullaby as he dreamed of hugs, butterfly kisses and little white flowers.